Because It's You

Every time we argue of the same issue all over again, I find myself refraining from telling you how I really feel. So much so that I start hating myself, up to a point where I can no longer breathe. I hate myself for holding on to you when I know your heart is far away and I hate myself for not being able to leave you. Even at this moment, I still hesitate because of you.

I want to cry and end things so I can be free of this heartache; so i can be more selfish when it comes to love but I couldn't do that because it's you. I want to tell you to start living and leave all the pain to me ut I couldn't because it;s you.

Insanity

What could possibly drive a person to the edge of sanity? Pushed so close to the edge of deep darkness without an alternate road to spare and the only way to salvage the error is to stay hanging there, making sure you don't fall or just take that leap.

In every human, there is a hint of craziness but were kept the way it is. The walks of life which consist of happiness, sadness, jealousy, anger, betrayal, hatred, back stabbing are some of the many scenarios and emotional investment that could amplify the negativity. The question to ask is how much of such emotional breakdown is enough to push one over the edge. A question that I believe even we cannot answer ourselves.

I was pushed to the extent. I felt like I was going crazy just thinking about the possibilities and questions wanting to be answered. When he cut me off from his life, I wondered how can a man be so cruel to so easily erased me from his life like I didn't mean anything. Was I that unworthy? Was I not good enough? Was I not loved? I tried so hard to make things work between us but he took me for granted. All that brought hatred in my life, of things I never imagined I was capable of. That much hate and agony I've suffered brought so much tears and sleepless nights.

I hate him. I hate her. I hate his guts. I hate her ruining my love story. I hate his lies. I hate her lies. I wish both him and her will end up in agony. I wish she will never find happiness in this relationship for she has ruined mine. I wish he will never find happiness in any relationship for he has destroyed my paradise. I wish she will suffer the consequences that she inflicted on me. I wish he will forever be in the darkness of negativity and slump. I wish she will never get approval of his friends and family. I wish he will one day look at me and realised all his mistakes.

Right when I thought I was getting better, I was inflicted again of their happiness from his photo. Then, I realised that I never really did walked away from the edge, just standing there. I know I will be able to find the way out from this mess but as of now, I'm standing there, surrounded by darkness and negativity.

Serene

Guy: What is your name?
Girl: Serene.
Guy: Do you live up to your name?
Girl: Physically.
Guy: What about emotionally?
Girl: A raging storm waiting to be released into the open. Rage of sadness, anger, jealousy, bitterness and ever more tears of finally being able to break free.

What Is Love?

They ask me what is it like to fall in love.

I say it's happiness. Finding that someone who you can always share your day with fills that loneliness you'd never admit of. Making memories with that someone which you hold dearly onto and it constantly brings out that silly grin you have plastered on your face on random days.

It's heart wrenching. Speaking too soon and breaking hearts in the heat of the moment; tears fall like it has been holding on for too long at the corner of your eyes. These are the moments where it will make the relationship stronger or break you.

Last but not least, it is home. Falling into that protective arms which will always make you feel like home. That sigh of relief whenever they embrace you and brings your feet back onto Earth. They are that home where you dock all your feelings, memories, beliefs, joy, tears and gratefulness.

Though love has ended for me, I am grateful for everything it has taught me. I learnt to love someone with all my heart, I learnt to treasure time, I learnt to appreciate you, I learnt to love your family(other than my own), I learnt patience and I learnt trust.

Thank you for the memories.

You No Longer Love Me

I miss his touch. His warmth. Waiting seemed to be the only thing that I had known of and yearning to be in his arms, made me feel like home. Thoughts of him pulled my heartstrings and I had never knew love was capable of such pain.

I miss his voice. His words. Texts started to feel like they were no longer enough and his voice of expressions were the only thing that can fill the void in my heart. His words of truth broke my heart and tears gushed out like it has been holding on for far too long. And, I'm still hurting.

I miss him. Only him. Feelings that feel so evidently real, somehow seems vague. When we said our goodbyes, I was holding onto some hope that this was all a nightmare that I would eventually wake up to but I didn’t. I curled up into a ball and cried my heart out.

This pain, this hurt, this tears, how can I stop it? Even when everyone asks for me to move on, I would still want to find some memories of us so you will always remain close to me. In my heart.

That void, that emptiness, that loneliness, how can I fill it? Even when I kept myself busy, my thoughts would still wander to you, of memories, of possibilities, and of all what ifs. In this foolish self, I find comfort.

You taught me what it's like to be a selfless woman, now it's my turn to take the lead and be selfish once in a while. 

Compulsive Buying Disorder

Compulsive buying disorder (CBD) is characterized by an obsession with shopping and buying behavior that causes adverse consequences. (Wikipedia, December 2013)

I'm not too proud about admitting it but at the same time I am proud to. Don't get me wrong that I enjoyed the whole shopping experience but I'm proud to say that I've been using my hard earned money to do the guilt shopping. I told my bf about it and he has not been very helpful with the advise cause he, like I am is pretty cheapo people when it comes to ourselves but would splurge on people we love and care about.

"You like? Just buy lah" (quote from him) =.= not very helpful loh! Make me want to buy more. 

I love shopping and I especially LOVE online shopping. As a child, I never had the luxury as my friends do of going on numerous shopping spree with their parents. I am only entitled to buy clothes during Chinese New Year and it will always be 3 sets of clothing to fill up the first 3 days of the auspicious celebration where we go house visiting. That's it! I may probably get more if I asked but I never thought that it was necessary or had the urge to want more. And being the cheapo that I am, I save up every year to about RM250 from my pocket money and used that money for the clothings instead of asking my parents for money, though they did insists on paying but I didn't want them to. I guess you can say that was my first monetary budgeting lesson. So, now with the money that I am earning, I feel more at ease about going shopping and buying more clothes (though I never really needed them). 

Now that I am working and earning on my own, I dare more hated the fact of asking my parents for money and spending it unnecessarily. I did ask for a loan for my last trip to Japan to which my mum gladly would GIVE the money to me but I managed to saved up enough with daily sandwiches and water to fund my trip. I didn't want anyone especially my relatives to think I am experiencing 'luxury' with my parents' money and spoiling me. It was my way of throwing all the bad comments they said as I was growing up back into their face.

Back to my disorder, I get super excited looking at clothes and compiling on lists of what to buy next. Yup! I do them. I am that kind of person that cares more on quantity than quality. So the cheapo side of me gives me the 'privilege' to buy more at a cheaper price! Like Budget Barbie, I buy clothes ranging from RM10 - RM30 [at most per piece]. If there are clothes that I don't like or couldn't fit after receiving them, I would give it to my cousins or donate them. Mind you, they are new clothes that I only tried on once. Then again, it's nothing to be proud of. If I were to NOT shop, I probably can put in more to my piggy bank. 

So as a conclusion, NO. I don't condone you to be a shopping freak like I am. 

Hard To Please Everyone

I came to face great mountains of challengers as I meet more people and as people I used to think I know are changing. I met clients who are fickle minded, confused on what they want/need, can never have the courtesy of reading emails I've sent, cannot coordinate with his own team and demanding ones. But I guess that wasn't as bad as to realizing I am still the same person I am back 10 years ago as I see friends around me change into a person I barely know.

As friends starts putting on make up, I am still working on my flaws. As friends starts chasing luxury and fame, I am still chasing for freedom. As friends starts to think they are better than who they were, I am still standing on the edge of curiosity and soul searching. As friends starts comparing their goods and deeds, I am still thankful for what I had achieved. As friends starts shining like a diamond, I am still a speck of dust. 

Many of you may encourage me for the change and be just like how my friends are. I can and already am. When friends who think they know me, I myself am changing as well. I acquire new knowledge, started working on my pet projects, meeting new great inspiring people and learning of a long journey to empathize others; but they may not see me as what I am. I have changed over the course of years but not physically, just mentally.

You may think I am a know-it-all, a stubborn, and an unconfident person. Do know that I get my facts checked before saying out loud than listen to what your friends tell you, do know that I stand for what I believe in than blinding following what others have to say, and I'm tired to speak my mind when all you do is turn me down for you oh-so-much-better suggestions. I understand how meeting different people in life makes you change the way you look at yourself. I understand how speaking with different people in life changes the way you want to be. When you think that I am still standing where I was 10 years ago, I had move forward with the better good. To be strict on decisions but courteous, be strong but polite, and not to let anyone walk over you.

From you peeps, I do learn as well that it's best to not say anything at all and only speak to suggest a solution and finalize a decision.

Thank you for being the best friends of all times and a learning platform for me.

Pet Project

It has been a while that I write on my blog. I think today will be a good day =)

Last week was my company's 1st birthday/anniversary! I am nothing but proud of my bosses ^^ who strive hard and strong to achieve what they have today. I am also glad to be part of this family. I met such great people whom never fail to inspire and motivate me every day. They can be quirky and psychologically challenging *in a good way* but I am really happy to have met them.

Today I manage to work finish all of my pet project and I am loving how I am paid for doing the things I love. And I hope my work is much appreciated and loved as well. It wasn't all smooth sailing, I lost my ways in terms of searching my style of writing and most importantly producing an agreement to secure my work. But I was in good hands of a great mentor. She had taught me so much about what she do and is always happy to share her experiences and knowledge with me. To her,I am very much grateful.

From my point of view, with your quality of work, i think u can sell that high. Your writing is good... in fact sometimes i feel it surpass mine with time and experience, you'll definitely be wah beyond my league d

I am very touched when she acknowledged my work. She of all people had the confidence in me that I, myself don't. I was never a star student/niece/daughter back in the days and had always been looked down on by family members and teachers. No matter how hard to try, I will never surpass my sister's shadow and to which in time, I lost the fire to fight. When she told me those words, my eyes twinkled with tears (even when I'm typing this out). I am most humbled and grateful for her recognition. I dare not greed nor hope much in the future but wish that there are many more opportunities to come to help me grow my wings.

For everything, I thank God for the opportunities and achievement I had thus far. Also, many thanks to the people who had faith and trust in me for working on their project. I can never thank you enough.

The Road To Independence

Yesterday I got involved in a car accident. It wasn't a big one. I lightly kissed the back of a Myvi as I didn't put on a full break and the car moved. Apparently, I was dreaming =.= Yup, that's the start of a new drama in my Friday morning to work. 

The guy made a scene and I didn't know who to call. I didn't want to call my parents as it was just a small matter. Both our car was not scratched nor was it dent. It didn't look like it just came from an accident. However, the guy made a big fuss and I just obliged to him, refused to make matter worst. Ended up in Perodua Service Centre, and was charged RM444.60 for the parts (bumper, screws & sensor), RM275 for workmanship and RM16.80 for tax. Yup, piling up to a good RM750. And, yes! I paid for it!!

I know you who are reading might be shouting at the computer screen reminding what an idiot I had been for paying. Might as well just file a report at the police station. I wouldn't mind doing that if I want my parents to know the first place! And, no, I didn't call my boyfriend first thing it happened. I didn't want to worry him and he's busy with work. But eventually I did tell him later of the day.

He got pretty upset. 1) That I didn't call him first thing it happened. 2) I paid a ridiculous amount for a car that doesn't even look like it has been through accident. He called the owner of the car again and made a calm 'fuss' to get a refund. For me, I just want to wash my hands off this case to which I got pretty upset when he did. This was the first time I walked out of the car on him. I know that he meant well but I just got pretty worked up in wanting to end this the way it is. 

Once I calmed down, I felt really bad for not calling him first thing. He was really upset that I have the thought because of his bust work schedule that I couldn't call him when I needed him. I am very much sorry. He had always make his way to make me a better person and a happy girlfriend and it made me felt that I didn't do good enough for him.

Anyway, he closed the file though it wasn't a successful account. I am grateful he came into my life and made a difference =) Thank you for everything.

A Letter Never Sent

Dear love,

How are you? Have you been thinking about me? I have.

Walking on the streets of Serangoon, having your favourite fish slice soup noodles, and thinking about the good times we had together. I missed you, I missed us. Memories that filled me in more ways than I cannot imagine. Like a movie I watched over hundreds, no thousands of times again but they never failed to make me cry a river every single time. Unlike The Notebook, we did not grow old together. Unlike The Wedding, we did not celebrate a mundane wedding anniversary. Unlike P.S. I Love You, you weren't there when I needed you the most.

I chose to leave before you do, so I wouldn't have to see your back and suppressing the urge to hug you, hold onto you. I chose to leave before you do, because I knew you wouldn't felt the way I did. I chose to leave before you do, so you wouldn't remember me in tears as you left. I chose to leave  before you do so you'll remember my smile.

I always tell myself that I am alright, that I am strong. I always thought I am okay as long as I smile, always thought it's okay even if we met. But the other day when I saw you at the mall holding her hands, the same eyes that looked at me is now looking at someone else's, the same lips that had touched mine is now touching someone else's, unknowingly my tears fell and I knew I wasn't alright. Little did I know that you were deeply pushed into a corner of my heart where I keep all my greatest fears.

Seeing you smile, seeing you happy had left reality knocked me hard in the head that you were better off without me. However, I was left with a baggage filled with fears, doubts, mistrust, anger, and sadness. I hope one day someone will take enough effort and love to unpack this baggage.

Love,
My heart.

You Got A Friend In Me

What is friendship? How do one define friendship?

To me, friendship is as simple as ABC. Making an effort to be one. One where we can laugh about silly jokes, one where we can talk about nothings, one where we can cry about romance movies.

What about those where you called/address as 'BFF' (Best Friend Forever)?

To me, it works the same as any other friendship. What makes you special or different from others are the deepest and darkest secrets that you know. One that will understand me better than anyone else. One that will never be upset over silly pranks/jokes we play. One that will make an extra effort to be one.

Today, one of my friend told me that one of my BFF unfollowed me on Instagram because I do not like her photos neither did I replied to her Tweets. They were rather upset bout that matter. To me, it's a laughing matter. Because I know her well enough (at least I think I do) to know that things like this is rather ridiculous to be upset about. It doesn't hurt me that someone is upset because I choose not be an active social networker and that I choose not 'like' her photos, but it did hurt me to know that she measured my friendship with her to the number of 'like'(s) on her photos and the reply to her Twitter. To let herself call me a BFF, I do have doubts.

Friends who confide in me because they trust me, friends who are there to just listen to me rant, friends who are there to give me a 'punch on the face' over certain issues, friends who do not care how I look, are all friends to me. BFF works the same but I will make an extra effort to keep your trust, to listen when you talk, to tell you ugly truths that you do not wish to hear, to tell you that you're beautiful and special because you are.

I made this post not to rant on the things that happened today but to remind myself that your friendship is a keeper because of everything that we had been thru.

Home for Good

My love is finally home for good after being away from it for 4 years and more. We've been in LDR from the start thus, 'the wait' had been the only thing I knew. Waiting for him to come back home during any festive seasons and waiting for my trips to go over to Singapore just to be with him and waiting for the best lovable moment to happen. 'The wait' was everything for us. At least to me it is nothing more important than that.

The usual ring on my MSN for a video call, the ringtone to my former Sony Ericsson to my now newly iPhone ringtone, the ringtone of Viber that cannot be changed which gave me a slight irritation when it's not mine but others, those were the other kind of waits to keep him and I connected. Though words may fall short at times, but I missed and appreciate it nevertheless. I dear to hear his voice on the other side of the receiver. It made me smile. Especially when I'm having a bad day. His call was all I need to turn that frown upside down.

We had our good times and also the bad times. But through it all, it made both of us grow, at least it did to me. I cried and whined and I wished he was there to hold me close and tell me 'Everything is going to be ok between us'. I was heart broken and was at the end of the cliff but that pull of love brought me back into his loving arms. The lessons groomed me to be a better person, a better girlfriend, a better supporter, a better friend and a better listener. I cannot deny that I am still on the brink but I am taking on step at a time to walk away from insecurities and into the greater forgiveness and appreciation of his past.

Now that he's home, I wish that the assurance in me will grow and the doubt will lessen. I do not expect much from him, just knowing that he's there mentally for me, is more than enough.

I'm glad that he's home =)

Am I The One To Blame?

She stood there in the rain, under the bus stop. Her skin shivers at every drop of pearl water. The gusting wind was to no help of the weather. As she stood there, the rain got heavier, the wind gone crazier, the sun no where to be found. She doesn't know for how long will she be standing there or for how long will the weather continue to her dismay, she just know how she stood there waiting. Do not know what she's waiting for, but she will know when it comes. Rain slowly soaked her clothes, clumping them over her skin. On that cold rainy day, she had no one to hold on to.

It was a summer breeze as she decided to take a walk under the sun. Not too hot, but just nice as the bright sky shimmers on her face. The warm delicate feeling, she liked it. With no direction, she just followed the road up ahead and walked for she knew something will be waiting for her up ahead. And when the time comes, when her walk comes to an end, she will know it is worth. Several times, she looked back and thought to herself if this never ending walk is worth it. She doubted not her goal but her capability of making it to the end. She took a step back, maybe just maybe the walk back will give her a nicer road. To what she had not imagine, dark clouds starts to come together and the rain starts to pour, slowly the wind join the fiesta of disaster.

Spotting a bus stop, she took shelter, for she do not know if she wants to continue looking back or moving back ahead. For many times had she been showered with disapproval upon looking back. But for how many times had she been showered with joy when she look ahead? Is the road up ahead really greener? Is the road really worth walking? Or should she just stop now and walk back home?

Somewhere Like This

WongFu released a new short today. It's about a couple who meets again after being separated after so long because the girl is going off for her studies. It's about finding the feeling that was once lost/ slowly faded away/ forgotten.

Recently, love and I had been meeting quite often, once a month. Some of you may think that how can once a month be classified as 'often'. Well, for the past two years of our relationship, we've only been meeting once every three/four months. Seeing how clingy I can get these couple of months, I wondered how did I ever get through 2 whole years by just meeting occasionally. But the feeling that I get every time we meet, it's something I can never be able to describe. The joy, the butterflies, the fluttering hearts, all that, it's something I can never forget. I asked love how did we survived not meeting each other after so many months for the past years when we now couldn't be away from one another. He said that we had love each other more through out the years so now, we couldn't bare being away from the other. I smiled.

I couldn't imagine myself when love is back for good.

My friends seems admire my patience of being away from the one we love for so long and sometimes, not talking with him for days. I guess you can say that it's a habit? Well, I don't deny that at times I longed to be in his arms but when I know that I can't, I try to fill myself with activities of my own. Watching dramas, reading novels and going out with my friends. It keeps me going, a  way of not loosing myself by still having 'me time'. Love gets his by going out drinking with his friends, so do I. I used to wait every single day for his call or for him to start video calling me on MSN. When I realised that I slowly losing myself from society, I started going out again with my friends. Now, I guess I wait less and love myself more in a way.

However, I thank my friends a lot for being there for me. I know that I am not the nicest friend you have but I appreciate every thing that you do for me. <3 div="">

I love you *muacks* 

Somewhere Like This

Working Life

Started work right after returning, people ask why I am in such a rush to get a job?

Well it's a competition every where you go. So I want to secure myself with a job first then slowly discover what the world has to offer.

Just started working in a small engineering firm. I am lonely and stressed because of this job, but I cannot deny that I learnt quite a lot in these few months.

I helped my boss set up the Penang branch company, started designing and creating website. Can not get any crazier. I know nothing about designing, what more creating a website! I was pushed to the edge because I am not familiar with designing. I finally gave in and called up a couple of friends to help me with it.

I am never more grateful when I started class with them. They are an eye opener! They took time out of their busy schedule to help teach me. They made my job so much easier! I struggled for one month to create a very simple design and do the linking!! 

I feel upset because my boss doesn't seem to understand when I say I am not from a designing and IT background and I have to learn everything from scratch! I know that I am rather slow but I have to go through videos after videos and reading after reading!! And to know all the codes to create the website is even worse! When I told my boss that I couldn't finish my work in time, he doesn't seem happy. 

He ask the IT guy to assist me, how is this helping when he ask me to create everything again using Photoshop, that I have to learn from scratch again!

I was challenged to the edge and finally made that phone call to ask some friends to help me. And, they really helped me lots! Encouragement from friends and love is the only thing that kept me going on this long.

When I finally send in my designs and work, I am never more proud of myself. Though they ask for a whole lot of changes, I just did. I feel more relieve that I manage to perform in my work.

After everything is done, I reflected on myself and found out that I complain too much and work too little. I am going to learn perseverance and patience to help make me a better and stronger person. 

Thank you for all the love and support =)

Summary of 2012

2012 seemed like a hell of a ride. The ups and downs, the challenges and thrills and definitely, another test from God.

1) Meeting love's parents was nerves!! All butterflies... The exact emotions that I felt before sitting for an exam, the exact emotions that I felt when we first went on a date

2) Meeting YouTube stars that had brought me and love together! WONG FU 4 LYFE!! Not to mention me got hugs from two hotties, Philip Wang and Wesley Chan, though Ted Fu wasn't there, this gave me a good reason to go meet them again in their next Asia Tour! <3 p="p">
3) Getting into one of the biggest fight with love that left a deep ugly scar but I'm glad we both gave each other a second chance. Through this as well, I finally burst. I had never pour feelings into words before and after this, it made me so. Either I change from bad to worst or bad to good, you decide *wink*

4) Going to Singapore for a number of time! Finally got permission to go Singapore alone to meet love! He brought me to places and created memories that will forever be embedded in my heart.

5) Going to Perhentian Island with love and his friends. My first beach holiday!! I am no swimmer but had also wanted a beach holiday! Ironic right? But seriously couldn't care less because I got to go with love! Had my first snorkeling session with love guiding me in his 'home', the sea. Though he got ill during the trip, I'm still happy that I went with him.

6) Saying hello with the land of sexy accent, Britain! Was there for my 3months summer degree program. I am thankful for the opportunity given and the experience was beyond words. I've been lonely, never had trouble with it until I was in Sheffield. Probably the home sick part kicked in, I got miserable. I depended a lot on love because friends were busy with their own stuff. This experience taught me a lot and showed me who my real friends are. Vayshna and PhaikIm showered me with all the love they can give and I can never ask for more. When I was down, they were there for me. Met a bunch of new friends and for the first time, spent most of my time in the library! It was an awesome library experience because Malaysia uni, doesn't provide me so =( Slowly, the feeling of loneliness doesn't feel so bad after getting the hang of the place.

7) First birthday abroad! Without friends and family, it was dull. Having love singing me Happy Birthday, I cried because I really wished he was here and he was the only one who sang me birthday song that day. Then, receiving great love from Vayshna all the way from Penang, really made me teared. Was having a tough time and her card really cheered me up.

8) Exploring places I have never thought of going. Been to Lisbon, Barcelona, Santorini, Athens, Rome, Pisa, Venice, Zurich, Berlin, Paris and London., Got into a big fight with fellow backpackers and our relationship turned sour. I cannot say that it was a great holiday, but I can say it was a great experience. I still wish to go back to these beautiful places one day with love. Because nothing is ever enough.

9) Finding a job. Been on job hunting even from the start of my Europe trip. Landed on a job that I was skeptical about. But my friends and love have been encouraging me and I was happy to have landed on this job.

2012 had put a test on my relationship with friends and love, it was tough but I'm glad I made it through with family. I hope 2013 will bring me wisdom and more learning experience, to be a stronger individual and achieving more.

Thank you, 2012

너를 실망해서 미안 해요, 너를 상처해서 미안 해요, 내 사랑

Because our happy and good times keep passing me by,

Because I feel like I will regret this till I die,
I have something to tell you right now

I still love you, I love you
Though I don’t know anything else, I know I want you

My tears are not stopping
I know I shouldn’t cry already but why do I keep crying?
My heart toward you acts however it wants
So it keeps sending me to you

I still love you, I love you
Though I don’t know anything else, I know I want you

Missing You

I see you
The one person in my heart I see you, who I longed for so much
Even if the tip of my heart hurts like this
Even if the tip of my hands tremble like this I can only think of you
The person I miss like crazy
The words I want to hear from you like crazy I love you, I love you - where are you?
The person I long for, who is deeply stuck in my heart
Please tell me that you cherish me
Please don't blankly erase me
Because you're my everything
Those hands that softly touched me
That warm smile toward me
The love that made even tears so beautiful
My heart is still the same I love you... I love you

I've stopped looking for boyfriend material kind of guy

Cause I've found the husband material kind of guy

I sincerely hoped you are the one for me

Of Lochness, Kilt and Pipebag!

A long planned trip where my friends and I drove up to Scotland! 3 cars, 15 people, 8 hours (due to many toilet breaks). Took off around 7pm after class on a Thursday, packed with snacks and my baby pillow =P

First destination was to Edinburgh where we freshen up (just washing our face) and slept in our car for the night! We had a pit stop at Tesco Extra which was 24hours, did some food shopping, toilet break, washing up and of course, sleep! Yes! We slept there in our car for about 3 hours when we were abruptly woken up by police officers on patrol claiming that it's against the law to sleep not under a roof. Basically, we have 3 guys with their sleeping bags, sleeping on the tar road next to our cars cause their long legs don't allow comfortable sleeping in the car. But once we explained our situation, they understood and asked us to enjoy our trip. Now, that explains my post the other day doesn't it? *wink* We took a drive to town where we had our breakfast and normal tourist adrenaline where we took photos of everything and be fascinated with the kilt business everywhere we go! and no it's not cheap @_@

Edinburgh: Yes! I was there are Elephant House! Didn't get to dine in cause they couldn't serve 15 people at once and I was at Portobello Beach =D

After exploring Edinburgh for half a day, we continued our journey to Inverness, a small town where the city center is just a 5min walk away from our student hostel! We visit the famous Dewar's Whiskey factory where you can smell whiskey right when you open the car door. No joke! It was a great learning experience on how Dewar family developed their whiskey business and how whiskey was produced. We even got a free whiskey tasting session at the end of the tour! How aWESome! but of course, I didn't take much. Just a sip and my face was burning! but it's certainly nice =D had our tea break at the garden at Dewar's before we headed down.

 

Inverness: At some castle near our hostel =P and of course the famous Dewar's Whiskey Factory! That big bottle cost only 90pounds! Okay, let's be real, if we don't convert, it's pretty cheap don't you think?

Next, we were headed to Isle of Skye! It's nothing much but the view was simply breath-taking! Beautiful mountains, seas and animals of the nature along the way. Of course we paid Nessie a visit on our drive down =D This time, our hostel was located near the seaside! We were greeted by the sound of waves and wind upon arrival. Another pit stop to Tesco extra for our BBQ supplies that night. I love how BIG it is! You find so many things you couldn't in the tesco here! =( BOO! My friends cooked ABC soup and Apple Honey water for us to warm our body up before the BBQ! Had my first BBQ marshmallow! yummy to the max! I didn't enjoy the BBQ much as I was falling sick then, heaty body from lack of water and late night sleeps.

 Lochness: Paid a visit to Nessie at Lochness Lake... how can you not? =)

Isle of Skye: At Saucy Mary's Lodge... See the bridge? We crossed that to the island

 Isle of Skye: At the top of the hill, where I saw Aries, the ram =D and of course beautiful greens 

Last destination before we head back to our lovely Sheffield was Glassgow! A town with big buildings but not enough to be called a city. We caught a glimpse of double rainbow on our drive to Glassgow! I was so excited as I had not felt so close to a rainbow before and seeing it so clear and near to me! and it's a double rainbow! I could really feel leprechaun jingling their pot of gold at me *winks* It was rather late when we arrived Glassgow so we headed to yet another Tesco extra for dinner supplies. Had prepacked spaghetti! It was delicious! And I got bottle Starbucks coffee for only 1 pound each! Taste just as good as ones you get off the counter of Starbucks cafe. No lie. We went for sight seeing as usual the next morning where we visited town. It was a great learning experience at the Kevingrove Art Gallery. A lot of history and information at that gallery.

On the way to Glasgow: Did you spot the double rainbow? Beautiful isn't it? =)

Glasgow: A very warm and cozy hostel, it's a house made into a hotel... really home like; And meet Mr. Scottish Bear =)

And the best of this whole trip was MALAYSIAN FOOD!! We paid a visit to Rumours Kopitiam, it was splendid! The food was worth every cent we paid. I dare to say that it's even better than what I taste back in Penang! No joke! I ordered Indian style fried noodles, while others ordered Curry Mee, Char Hor Fun, Nasi Rendang Ayam, Claypot Tauhu with rice, Char Koay Teow, Salted fish fried rice, and Tai Lok Mien. Delicious beyond words! We really felt closer to home that day. I had iced YinYang and it tasted really good. Basically, I just enjoyed my food... We went for shopping session and off we go home!

We were greeted by the beautiful night view of Sheffield and shone by Mr.Moon who was shining brightly in the dark night, accompanied by shining stars. Beautiful.

Sheffield: See the beautiful night sky... Do you hear Jacob turning? Teehee...

An inside joke we had, was the car I was in was the ONLY car without a GPS but we are the car with iPhones and smartphones that had safely direct the way to 3 of the cities we've been to! How funny when the other 2 cars who had GPS couldn't find the way. All hail technology!

Jjang!! A little treat for you guys! Scottish men in Kilt! The guy on the right really aged with grace...

Till then,
Serene

Up and About

Hey guys! Sorry for the hiatus~ It's not that I've been busy but I've been LAZY! I've been going to places as you can see on my Facebook (didn't plan to upload them but my mum have been pestering dad to show her my photos but I didn't so now I did). So far, been to York, Whitby, Manchester, Liverpool, Leeds, Cheshire Oak(a designer outlet mall), and will be going to Cambridge this weekend! Since I'm not entitle to be a member of Cambridge University, taking a photo there and pretend that I am is already a thrill to me *muka tak tahu malu* The following weekend, my friends and I are driving up to Scotland! Yes, the land of Lochness and pipebag! If I'm lucky, I may get the chance to see her! Beautiful creature of the mystic times =D

 As much as I love being here, I still do miss home. A house is not a home. I realize this now. But I am thankful to my parents that I'm able to be here. Helping me get a degree and letting me explore the other part of the world. I enjoyed myself so much that I wish you are here with me (whoever that's reading this). I want to be able to share this beautiful place and experience with you. One of the best experience was to be part of the Olympics Torch Relay! 3hours or more wait was a kill but when the torch bearer jog by us, it's nothing but proud. Once in a lifetime opportunity.

My friends and I have been cooking together a lot these days. Almost every weekend, setting up themes on what to cook to represent home. So far, we had steamboat(awfully good for the chilly weather here), pan mee, tomyam bihun, and roasted pork! YES! We feel very much at 'home' with these food. The fact that I'm missing the dumpling and moon cake festival, I think about home a lot. Yes, these are the littlest things that I had took granted off. We crave for a lot of food here. Nasi lemak, roti canai, char koay teow, mamak food(Ali!), fish slice soup noodles and so on. Don't get me wrong. I do enjoy the fish and chips, kebabs and burgers here as these are real fish and burger patties (much less processed), but it will never taste like 'home'.

Scenery here are breath-taking. Green fields and farms and beautiful flowers everywhere! While you pay RM5 for a stalk of rose, I pick them up from the side walk. No joke. What seems like romance and luxury flowers back home, it's found every where by the road or in Tesco! There are roses and daisies at the court yard of my hostel. And, we can take a bus ride or 20min walk from here to get to the nearest farms! We see flocks of sheep, cows and horses! It's like a dream come true to me because I really want to meet a horse and when I did, I couldn't hide the joy! And as you can see from my photos, I met alpacas! They are really soft and fluffy! Took me a lot of trouble chasing them to get a decent photo so appreciate it! =P This is the beautiful life.

Though I may be surrounded by many people but I still feel alone. I miss you =(

Love from Sheffeld,
Serener